Anxcited for Canada

anxcited

Anxious and excited

11.49pm, yet another night tossing and turning, unable to switch off.

It’s now just over a month until D-day when the Canadian adventure begins.

Am I ready? No.

My housemate (Mike) is staying for at least 6 months whilst I’m away. He introduced me to his friend, Sam, a couple of weeks ago as a potential additional tenant. <Thumbs up> a decent lad. Given that Mike has been great the last 9 months, I trust the boys will look after the property for me. My plants however, well, we’ll see! #cactussos.

Becoming a landlord requires a lot of effort, red tape and research. I’ve obtained a tenancy agreement, had the electrics tested and upgraded, a gas safety engineer confirm the property isn’t likely to kill anyone (and unintentionally show me his builders bum), spruced up the paintwork and written to all the relevant bill providers to tell them; “I’m off…tally ho.”

I still need to sort out landlord insurance, renew my mortgage and get consent to let, pack up the remainder of my belongings and leave my job. (Amongst a long list of other to-dos which will be ticked off in order of the amount of anxiety they cause/importance.)

Time. I don’t yet feel like I’ve properly thought about leaving this life here, my friends, family, cat and career. All things I know my emotions will hit me with when I get on that plane. It’s hard to even open my soul to those feelings right now, I’m going and I know it’s a chance and a choice I won’t regret.

This year and last has felt a lot like mental mountaineering, climbing against all weathers of emotions trying to see and take the optimum route. At times, the chosen route has been what’s easiest in the moment but detrimental in the long term. Sliding back down away from all the progressive steps taken, defeated, unsure if I can continue the climb to where I was, let alone any place past it.

When I go to Whistler, I will physically be facing real mountains, ready to be climbed, summits within reach. Mentally, I am determined for my mind to be present with my body when I get there. Here’s to hoping and continuing those steps forward.

Let’s tip the balance of anxiousness to excitement and hope I can now get a good nights rest.

Love SER x

3 month Canadian countdown 

Today is 3 months to the day I get on a plane from the UK and change my life forever by heading to Canada. Pastures new, I’ve never been or seen before.

This change will be a fresh slate, new surroundings, friends, work and experiences.

I chose Canada with the aim of heading for the mountains of Whistler in British Columbia as they have one of the best ski resorts in the world.

I have so many feelings about my move, I have no job, accommodation or family there. I’m going with my visa, my passport, some money in my pocket and the clothes in my suitcase.

The reasons I’m leaving my current life behind…. to name a few, are the following;

1 – I’m 30 this year, it’s my last chance to get a working holiday visa for up to 2 years.

2 – I’m single, childless, inquisitive and agile enough to do it.

3 – I love nature, the great outdoors, skiing/snowboarding and the freedom and exhilaration it brings.

4 – I vowed this time last year I wouldn’t be in the same place I was then, overworked, exhausted, suffering with severe anxiety and depression largely because of work, I took time out to seek counselling, to recoup and re evaluate the meaning of life and what I want from it.

5 – My grandma died in October 2016, may she rest in peace. A death in the family really puts time and life in perspective, we’re here once and once only, there is no second chance. I want to look back on my life and think I’ve lived it. My grandma would be supportive of me seeing new countries, cultures and making life a non stop adventure.

So there we have it, this has been something I’ve been thinking of doing since the new year, I’ve got my visa application approved, my insurance for two years (with all my medical conditions covered) and my flights booked for September 14th.

I’m going to rent out my house, give my beautiful cat, chief to my boss to look after (who I will miss dearly) and quit my office job.

It’s time to make a change… dreams don’t happen because you dreamed them, they happen because you do something about them.

Follow me on my adventure.

Love you

SER x